Home Archives December 2008 Out of the frying pan

Out of the frying pan

| Print |  Email
Monday, December 01, 2008

There’s been a lot of criticism directed at those who believe the economic sky is is falling. The backlash against irrational panic has reached such a level that we did a quick phoner with the CEO of Chicken Little Consulting, the creative birdbrain behind the panic campaign, as she caught her breath from running around like a well, you know.

Do you regret your infamous “The Sky Is Falling” campaign? Like all good fables, there is a bit of truth to what’s being said, but a lot of misinformation. When the acorn hit me on the head earlier this year, I could have done one of two things: ignore it and chance that the entire kingdom was doomed, or run through the village screaming and rush to tell the King that the world was coming to an end. Look, we thought we had it right. We needed to take swift and decisive action even before we knew what the full situation was. Hank Paulson has privately called to thank me.

s_Robin ROBIN DOUSSARD

You’ve been vilified lately as the symbol of what not to do. President-elect Obama said recently, “This isn’t a time for fear or panic. This is a time for resolve and leadership.” The clucking class says that was aimed directly at you. I wasn’t the only one saying the sky was falling, but I’m an easy target. Remember, I’m a chicken. The entire barnyard was up in arms at one point. But I can’t say it doesn’t hurt.  Republican Rep. Jerry Weller went rogue on me and said, “Once again, Chicken Little has been proven wrong.” Then Barrons mocked me with a headline that said, “Sorry, Chicken Little.” Everyone always blames the messenger.

I feel your pain. How’s your staff taking the basting? You know, I’m a tough old bird, so I don’t let it get to me. But Goosey Loosey, head of our creative services, is taking it pretty hard. He’s no longer loosey or goosey and in our business that’s a killer. Henny Penny, our financial VP, is putting all our eggs into one basket. But the last thing we need is to lose confidence. That will only make it worse. We’re just afraid of ending up like poor Chip Diller from The Animal House Group. He hasn’t worked since 1978 after his “Remain calm. All is well!” advice during that dustup at that university in Eugene.

Any bright spots? I really like the chickenlittlewasright.com website. And we’ve got a sharp new guy coming aboard. Knows the political landscape. His name is Foxy Loxy. Have you heard of him? He’s part of the bailout team and he’s coming over to the house tonight for dinner and says he has a bundle of incentives for us. Not the usual chicken feed. He specifically asked that we invite Turkey Lurkey, who was the brains behind our campaign for the Three Little Pigs’ subprime housing proposal. Foxy says he really likes Turkey. If this goes well, we could be back in the game before this thing is over.

One last question, and I’m sorry we have to ask. But why did the chicken cross the road? To bypass the regulators, of course.

 

 

More Articles

Growing a mobility cluster

News
Friday, October 31, 2014
0414 bikes bd2f6052BY LINDA BAKER | OB EDITOR

Why are there so few transportation startups in Portland?  The city’s leadership in bike, transit and pedestrian transportation has been well-documented.  But that was then — when government and nonprofits paved the way for a new, less auto centric way of life.


Read more...

Political Clout

November/December 2014
Wednesday, October 22, 2014
BY KIM MOORE

Businesses spend billions of dollars each year trying to influence political decision makers by piling money into campaigns.


Read more...

Reimagining education to solve Oregon's student debt and underemployment problems

News
Thursday, November 13, 2014
carsonstudentdept-thumbBY RYAN CARSON | OP-ED CONTRIBUTOR

How do we skill up our future technology workforce in a smart way to take advantage of these high-paying jobs? The answer shouldn’t focus only on helping people get a bachelor’s degree.


Read more...

Kill the Meeting

November/December 2014
Wednesday, October 22, 2014
BY AMY MILSHTEIN

Meetings get a bad rap. A few local companies make them count.


Read more...

Shifting Ground

November/December 2014
Wednesday, October 22, 2014
BY JOE ROJAS-BURKE

Bans on genetically modified crops create uncertainty for farmers.


Read more...

What I'm Reading

November/December 2014
Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Peter Lizotte at ACME Business Solutions and Roger Busse at Pacific Continental Bank share their favorite reads.


Read more...

I Know How You Feel

November/December 2014
Wednesday, October 22, 2014
BY JESSICA RIDGWAY

Most smartphones come equipped with speech recognition systems like Siri or Cortana that are capable of understanding the human voice and putting words into actions. But what if smartphones could do more? What if smartphones could register feeling?


Read more...
Oregon Business magazinetitle-sponsored-links-02
SPONSORED LINKS